Tag: Working together

How my son hurting himself, helped me

ChelseaLeave a comment

I’m sure you are thinking “Wow, she is crazy for thinking her son being hurt is a good thing.” But first, he is fine, nothing major, just needs to rest. And second, life lessons come in the weirdest forms. You can’t always control it.

See, I am working on presence and patience with my kids. Something that, especially lately, I have not had enough of. But something shifted today. Not because I spent more time with them or even was more patient with them, but because I realized the more I create the foundation of the family and fill in those cracks, the more solid they can build our walls. So let’s get on with it.

Beautifully clean bathroom

Let’s start with this bathroom. Does this bathroom look like a 10 year old cleaned it?! No?

Because he didn’t. He took a spill today while riding. And while he saved himself more pain because he hopped off instead of straight falling off, he managed to twist his ankle in the process.

But today was his day to clean the bathroom. Typically, I would have let it go. What’s one time of missing the bathroom being clean? Ultimately nothing. We would survive, the bathroom would get clean next week, and life would go on.

But what if I cleaned it for him? What if I took the 15-20 minutes and cleaned it myself? This…

He saw that it is ok to rest when he needs to.

He saw that family, helps family.

He saw that Mom can be lenient and understanding. (Something he probably doesn’t see enough)

He saw that we all live here and are responsible for the state of the house.

He saw that he doesn’t have to do it all (though he will probably still tell you he does).

And what did I gain? A child who can find peace and know resting is ok because we will be there to help.

Oh… And a MUCH cleaner bathroom than he would have had… But baby steps…🤷‍♀️🤣

Monthly Money: Ramsey the Free Way

Chelsea1 Comment

Ok, this one is kinda adult-y. I don’t even have any pictures for it. It isn’t super fun for most, actually it is down right stressful for many. But it is honest. And I am super excited to share the hope.

When it comes to money, I am all over the place. I hate paying full price, but I am the first to admit I will buy stuff I don’t need. I won’t pay for things I know I can get for free either. I understand why certain things are marketable and people will pay for them… but I am not that person. However, that doesn’t make me a fiscally responsible person. To be honest, I probably am not. Not because I don’t have the knowledge to be but because I let bad choices become bad habits and now I have to break out of that.

In the past 12 years, our lives have changed so much. We have gone from a well cushioned life of a newly wed double income couple, and run the gambit to both being completely unemployed for a couple weeks. Let’s just say in 10 years we have often tried to get on track. When I was first researching financial plans and how to get on track after becoming a stay at home mom 9.5 years ago, that was when I first came across Dave Ramsey. It struck a chord but didn’t stick. Nothing did. Except constant worry and stress. It led to many sleepless nights, hardships, and even tension in our home.

Well, after Mermaid arrived on scene 2 years ago, and yet again being a completely stay at home mom with no income, something had to give. Making changes was no longer an option. And continuing to ask for help when we are capable adults, was just embarrassing, because -yeah- we did that… My first task was to get all of our bills on track and current. Sadly much harder than it should have been. We had a lot of car issues, hospital bills, and just bad decisions on my part. No excuses though. I needed to change.

I was talking with a dear friend who was also dealing with some financial stuff and we talked about the Dave Ramsey plan, Baby Steps and all. I committed to myself and my family to make better choices about where our money was going. I read books by Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruze (his daughter) but I got them from the library (e-book loans are my favorite things!) because why spend the money on them? Dave and Rachel wouldn’t want me to do that… I am trying to get my money on track! I joined their groups on Facebook and followed them on Instagram. I searched Pinterest for Baby Step ideas, listened to podcasts and so much more. But one thing I would not do is spend money on the products. I wasn’t going to use money when I knew I could find the information for free. There are probably hundreds if not thousands of blogs that will take you through the Baby Steps. If you need to convince yourself to get on board with it, or get your spouse on board with it, or if you need the extra coaching, I am not telling you not to buy their stuff. I am sure it is 100% worth it. But do it properly. Start by saving up for it. Want to do Financial Peace University? Awesome. Save up $5 every paycheck until you can get there. Because one thing Dave Ramsey and his cohorts wouldn’t want you to do, is make things worse trying to make them better.

This is going to be the journey of our financial change. In about 24 months we will have gone from barely keeping our head above water (and sometimes not even doing that) to almost debt-free. We still have one we are working on other than our mortgage, but I will be doing everything I can to get that paid off by Mermaid’s birthday next year! I won’t post a ton about it but I am hoping to give someone out there hope that things can change. And it will get better. It may take time but I promise it is worth it!

Ways to do Ramsey BabySteps the FREE Way:

  1. Use their websites. There are a ton of free resources that you can look up. Including what the Baby Steps are and trackers for the first 3! It also has budget worksheets for every type of income.
  2. Use Pinterest, Blogs, and the internet and any other resources on your computer.
  3. Do a easy zero based budget on your computer using Excel.
  4. Sell anything you can. Some people take this to the extreme and sell their cars and house… don’t do that. You need transportation and you need a place to live.
  5. Seriously and discriminately look at where your money is going and cut out ANYTHING that isn’t necessary with the exception of the money you leave to treat yourself.
  6. Treating yourself is important in this process. You don’t want to restrict your budget so much that you have no fun in your life ever. But definitely be honest with yourself. 1 cup of Starbucks a week is doable. But do you really need one EVERYDAY?
  7. Find the books and even the workbooks on places like Amazon, Thrift book, etc for a percentage of the original price and usually in great condition!